A FOXY SATURDAY

Have you ever had one of those days when you turn in at night and think to yourself 'wow, that was a good day'?

Mine happened yesterday and it was a good day not for any major reasons like winning the lottery, finding your eternal soulmate or finding a tv programme that's not being presented by Davina McCall. It was a good day simply because it was stress-free and didn't involve running round like a headless chicken.

The day started well without for once receiving a bill or junk mail. My phone didn't ring with someone called 'Sean' from a call centre in Mumbai. Manchester United beat Burnley 3-0 and Blackpool got a draw. I called in at my parents and there were no major incidents with fires, floods or famine. My nephew had his homework all done and didn't require me to do a 2000 word essay overnight and in time for Monday morning. My other nephew reported he was 3 cards nearer to completing his Match Attax collection.

In the evening, I met up with some friends in a superb little Thai restaurant in Lytham. Had a great meal and laughs a plenty during Thai curry and a few cheeky bottles of cider. One of the girls was telling the story of a relationship and within a few months of it not working out, subsequently seeing her ex's cousin. Her mum had warned her to be careful of getting involved in a 'fromage-a-trois'. I love that. It's the way a Malapropism / Spoonerism is used unintentionally within a sexual context that I find so funny. Early in my nursing training on a medical ward, I was chatting to two elderly ladies. One of them earnestly warned me to be careful of 'that shifty-looking Sister with the short hair'. 'She's Lebanese that one. You know one of them'. The other lady stated that she wasn't Lebanese at all, she was from Wigan. The reply was something on the lines of 'you get a lot of that sort of thing in mining towns'. Priceless.

Fast forward to the early hours of the morning and I'm driving home with the CD player blasting and I'm just about to turn into my road when I spot two foxes up ahead in the middle of the road. I live next to farmland so I've spotted a fox around here before, but never a pair. I switched my engine off and just watched these elusive animals frolicking about for a while before they headed off under a bush and back towards the fields. Rather cruelly, I was secretly hoping that Basil and Samantha Fox had taken out a couple of resident cats that are the bane of my life by their continual need to use my garden as a urinal. Not viciously killed you understand, just taken round the back of the wheelie bins for a right good kicking.

And with that thought of cat culling parked in my tired brain, I took myself off to my new bed which was lovingly adorned in new white cotton sheets, with a smile on my face and a happy expectation of not getting up until lunchtime....