Friday, 14 May 2010


If there's one type of car that can guarantee to hack me off more than any other, it's the people carrier. Allow me to explain... 

It's 08.45 and you're trying to get to work. On route is 2 or 3 primary and junior schools. Outside each school and clogging up the peripheral roads are the scourge of other drivers..
a) the Chelsea tractors 
b) the people carriers

The X5's, Range Rovers and Freelanders are bad enough. It's when I'm stuck behind a young mother who opens the Citroen Picasso or Zafira car door (usually straight on to oncoming traffic) to let little Phoenix and Chardonnay out from the back seat and in to school. The mother's usually give a look to say 'hey, I'm a mother doing a very important job here and if that means holding you up, then tough tits'. 

I sit there through gritted teeth, watching these imbecilic women parking their people carriers to unload one or may be two tiny children and I wonder what on earth possessed you to buy such a huge car for taking a child to school? And then I see them unload lunch boxes, violin cases, pump bags, school bags and I still think, yeah, that's a lot of crap to unload for a midget wearing a very small pair of shorts and school tie but I still think it could get into a mini. 

I just think people carriers have that twatty statement that says 'hey, we've got kids!' 'we're fertile and need the room for an expanding family of one'. It's up there with those ubiquitous car stickers 'Princess on Board', 'Twins on board', or the worst one ever..'Powered by fairy dust'. 

And another thing. Just how far are these children being transported to school? The catchment area for our two village schools must be at least a 25 mile radius to justify getting the Zafira or the X5 revved up? Pah....

1 comment:

  1. Hey Helen,
    Just to let yu know, your aged parents also drive a people carrier, infact they drive the Vauxhall Zafira. It will shock yu that grandad actually drives me to school and joins the school run nearly every morning to make sure I get to school on time.
    However grandad does not escort me out of the car, I simply get dropped off right outside the school gates, blocking all access to other cars getting in through the gates, which usually pisses all the parents off but thats grandad.
    Good blog though H