BIG BROTHER LAUNCH NIGHT

It's 2010, it's in the 11th series, Davina is screaming already, it's on every night throughout summer, there's a few shocks in store... yes, hold on to your hats because Big Brother is back for the last ever series.
I hate myself for watching it but I'll no doubt be glued to my tv for the last showing of a little bit of tv history. 
So during tonight's launch, here's the housemates entering tonight... 


1. Josie (blonde, Bristolian, looks a bit of a goer) 
2. Steve (ex soldier. Heavily tattooed. Has 8 kids and an eye like Tony Gordon from Corrie. Disabled following bomb attack in Belfast)
3. Ben (very posh and foppish. Tim Nice-but-Dim springs to mind. So does the word wankwipe)  
4. Rachel (Beyonce look-a-likee. Vain, lazy and a right little madam)
5. Nathan (mono-eyebrow, naff Northern lad, hideous laugh) 
6. Dave (Christian minister, looks like a lesbian particularly Billie Jean King, wears monk's outfit. Welsh and annoying)
7. Caoimhe (pronounced Keever apparently. Irish, beautiful & likes girls)
8. Govan (giggly effeminate boy age 21. Virgin but self-proclaimed big willy. Josie will make a man of him) 
9. Shabby (arty, squattor, loud, doesn't want a job, lesbian)
10. Ife (singer & dancer, black lady. Could be fireworks with Beyonce)
11. John James (Australian blonde beach surfer hunk) 
12. Sunshine (medical student, spoilt, childish. Won't last too long with the bully girls or Shabby having her evil way with her in the showers)
13. Corin (Katie Price look-a-likee. Gobby Northern girl with false bits)
14. Mario (picked at random and entering the house as a mole - not the blind creature that buggers up you lawn, but picked to do dastardly deeds against housemates whilst evading detection)


So, that's it. The full list of housemates. Token disabled, black, gay in-situ. Usual WAG-type young ladies who play with their hair a lot whilst gazing at their reflection in the mirror. A couple of lusty young lads who will have their pick of the ladies. And of course, the usual freaks all brought to life by the highly excitable and equally annoying Davina McCall.