Tuesday, 15 June 2010


Have you ever thought how many phrases and questions are presented to you each day to which you smile and reply politely, but all the time and with a great deal of restraint, you find yourself wanting to say proudly and very loudly ... well, for the sake of propriety, check it out in the alphabetti spaghetti. 
Today was another of those all-to-frequent challenging days of too much work, too little time. Just when you get your head down, you get inundated with the type of questions or phrases that can send Mother Theresa into Chubby Brown. Allow me to introduce you to a few of the phrases which cause my hair to go a deeper shade of grey and have me heading into la-la land with Tourettes Syndrome...

In work:
'I know you're having your lunch, but can I just ask you...?'
'So if I could leave that one with you...?'
'Can I ask you what this means..?'
'Have you got a minute?....'
'Can I have a private word outside?.....'
'It needs to be done today...'
'Sorry to ask, only I know you're really good at....'

In love:- 

Can I be honest with you?....' 
'Will you be honest with me?....'
'Do you not love me anymore?...'
'What are you thinking?...'
'Was it good for you?....
'How was I?...'
'Am I the best?....'

'Are you asleep yet?...'
'If you loved me you'd....'

With friends:- 
He won't bite you, he's just being really friendly...'
'Can I borrow your....?'
'Can you lend me £....?'
'Can you babysit on Saturday night?....'
'I'm not keeping you from anything am I?...'
'Are you watching this or can I switch over?...'
'I'll just stay for another drink if that's ok?....'

Miscellaneous and enough to send your blood pressure rising...
'You have exceeded your overdraft limit and will be charged...'
'You are due for your smear test....'
'Can I interest you in a copy of the Watch Tower?...'
'You are currently 4th in the queue....'
'Sorry, this checkout is now closed...'
'Press 1 for bill payments...2 for account details....'
'Good morning BT billing...'' 
'Do you know what speed you were doing back there madam?....'
'April Fools!...'

Any more, for any more? 


  1. 'United? Bloody glory supporter...'

  2. Ah yes. That old chestnut aimed at United supporters. Glory hunters perhaps applies to 1992 onwards. Most of us supported United through the dark days of relegation, when they weren't so great and Liverpool were on top. Good shout Russ.