LANCASTER LAUGHS ARE HARD TO FIND....

Ok, it's the night after our soiree into Lancaster to see John Shuttleworth and as promised, here's the full match report...
Company?... great
Food beforehand?...fantastico
Dukes Playhouse?... fab
John Shuttleworth?... shite
Sorry, but I just didn't get it. I sat there with my arms folded, straining to listen due to pretty damn poor acoustics, and after about 13.2 seconds, came to the grim realisation that I did not find this man remotely funny. Have you ever had one of those twilight zone moments when you're sat somewhere and everyone gets the joke but you? Well last night, I looked round to see hundreds of people chuckling, guffawing and singing along to this kn*bhead playing an organ, and I sat there with a grimace and a more than passing glance at my watch. It was a long night. That was until I spotted an old work colleague in the audience who I had last seen many years ago. After a couple of high pitched 'coo-eee's' and waving my arms like a demented fool, I finally caught his attention before he does a Pat Cash at Wimbledon and bounded over seats towards my direction. After lots of hugs and 'how the bloody hell are you's?', I remembered what great fun he was and still is. We had some rib-busting laughs together and shared a rather childish sense of humour and a love of camp comedians, mimicry and great music. We went to many a work's christmas party and got as drunk as skunks whilst hitting the dancefloor whilst strutting our stuff like a couple of mo-fo's. I went to his wedding and years later shared a few tears together when his marriage ended. We went to see the rather fabulous Eric Clapton in concert down in Birmingham one eventful evening and laughed when various people asked if was a famous actor around at the time. He was as soppy as me and I remember us both blubbing like a couple of girls when Eric strummed away to Tears in Heaven. Our shared topic of conversation at the time was our mutual hatred of our jobs. With Eric's song as our inspiration, we both plotted and planned our future careers and how we would 'Change The World'. He took a career in law and I took nursing where I can erm.. do wonders with a syringe and dimpled charm. He still has a few demons from the past which we chatted about, but he's still essentially a great bloke and made me laugh more in 10 minutes than John Shuttleworth would in a month of Sundays. We left saying we'd catch up soon and I promised I'd get in touch with some other old workmates and arrange a night out with a few beers and a curry. So Cookie, this one's for you and to a night in Brum many years ago watching the God that is.. Eric Clapton...