WIG WAM BAM ...

...Dedicated to my quirky, short-legged buddy and proof that there was an original version before Black Lace put their cringeworthy pelvic thrusts on it (I've checked out the version on You Tube and it's really that bad). During a recent late night exchange of drunken texting, this track was allegedly being danced to by the short-legged one. I can only shudder to think of her dancing away to this with a Bargain Booze worth of rum and coke in her belly and a post it note still attached to her fringe. 

Ms RainbowBright - you may drive about an inch away from your steering wheel without a care in the world... You may chatter my head off without drawing breath at alarming regularity... You may on occasion, be very bossy, distractable and change your mind constantly at the drop of a hat... You may point out with unwaivering directness (and also with worrying regularity) how horrible I have been.. You may constantly take me on a 100mph rollercoaster ride through your brain's random thought processes and introduce me to a world of total insanity... You may often end phone conversations abruptly with a terse 'goodbye', generally whilst I am still half way through a conversation...You may occasionally bake gingerbread men in the shape of Little Britain's Dafyfdd's 'the only gay in the village' then appear hurt when this is pointed out...You may often grab my car door handles for dear life and tell me to slow down and put my seatbelt on...You may do a weird squiggle for a letter 'S'...You may talk in a unfathomable accent and say 'I think it's very in-a-pror-priate' much to the delight of my both myself and my colleagues in the team...

But for all that, you make me laugh probably more than you'll ever know and for all your quirkiness (and believe me, you have it in abundance), you have highly respected principles, a unique spirit and a generous and kind soul. You're also a true Northern girl who takes pride in her roots rather than renounce them. There's no hint of pretentiousness with this lady despite having the qualifications matched with a keen intellect that's worthy of shouting from the rooftops.
Oh, just one other thing...you have a thread of loose cotton hanging from the hem of your black kecks and a dodgy taste in football teams. Just thought I'd share that with you...